Jesus Christ is King

Trump Supporter Executed Live On Stage At Grammy Awards

NEW YORK, NY—In a moving highlight at this year’s Grammy Award ceremony, 42-year-old Trump supporter Bill Myers was called up onstage and executed by way of the guillotine partway through the proceedings.

“We’ve got an extra special surprise for you tonight,” host James Corden said just after Bruno Mars accepted his 43rd award of the show. “Voilà!” he exclaimed as he pulled a black cover off the archaic execution device.

At that, Myers was dragged kicking and screaming up to the podium, where he was forced to his knees and compelled to confess that he does in fact support some of Donald Trump’s policies. Audience members beaned him with rotten fruit, moldly vegetables, and copies of Fire and Fury: Inside the Trump White House, until finally, he was marched over to the guillotine and had his head pushed down underneath the sharp, shining blade.

“Any last words?” Corden said as he prepared to turn a lever and drop the blade.

“I just said I liked his stance on small businesses!” Myers is then seen screaming for his life on footage of the event.

Shaking his head in disgust, Corden then pulled the lever. The blade sang its melody of death, cleanly lopping Myers’s head off. The host lifted his head up to the chanting crowd, eliciting a 15-minute standing ovation, with a spontaneous chant of “Not my president!” erupting throughout the audience. Corden tossed the head to the crowd, where it was then batted about like a beach ball, according to attendees.

At publishing time, several Trump supporters’ heads had been mounted on spikes outside Madison Square Garden as a warning.

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