Economy Takes Sharp Dive As Nation Stays Home From Work To Play New ‘Super Smash Bros.’ Game

U.S.—The economy took an unprecedented hit Friday as the entire nation stayed home from work to play the new Super Smash Bros. game.

Business and commerce ground to a halt as essential workers binged Super Smash Bros. Ultimate all night and well into the morning, completely forgetting to get up and go to work the next day. Power grids went down all over the country, forcing people to fire up their generators to keep playing.

“This is unprecedented,” said a CNN Money commentator. “We’ve tanked by a few thousand points when Red Dead Redemption 2 came out, but with Smash, you’ve got everyone going over to their friends’ houses to yell at each other while bashing each other’s heads in with classic Nintendo characters. It’s every economy’s worst nightmare.”

Even the few dozen people who did go to work brought their Switches with them, facing off as Pikachu, Ridley, Samus, Inklings, and the rest of the gang instead of contributing to the GDP.

The economy did make some small recoveries due to government workers not showing up, however.

On the plus side, America is now expected to wipe all remaining Swedish players off the power rankings.