Man Sleeps On Floor After Being Forced Off Bed By Wife’s Decorative Pillows Again

DENVER, CO—Local man Michael Martinson was forced to sleep on the floor again last night after he was unable to find any space on the bed, thanks to his wife’s massive decorative pillow collection.

The man walked into the bedroom and humbly took his place on the floor, because there was no room for him on the bed.

“I am loving my wife as Christ loved the church,” he told reporters the next morning as he tried to massage a knot out of his neck. “Just as He laid His life down for us, so I lay myself on the floor all night so she can enjoy the 342 different decorative pillows she’s spent so many years collecting.”

Several times throughout the night, Martinson attempted to climb onto the bed but caused a dangerous avalanche of pillows and was forced to abandon his attempts lest he become trapped.

The couple is reportedly working on a compromise in which Michael’s wife will have a second bedroom to hold all her decorative pillows, and the man can once again sleep in his own bed.