Youth Pastor Takes Sabbatical To Give Himself A Break From Eating Pizza, Playing Video Games All Day

FRESNO, CA—Local youth pastor Stu “Sparky” Robinson announced to his youth group Sunday that he will be taking a month-long sabbatical in February in order to give himself a break from eating pizza, drinking Mountain Dew, and playing video games all day.

The youth pastor makes it a point to schedule some time each year away from his youth group to help him recharge his batteries, both his figurative batteries and also the battery that powers his Xbox One controller.

“It’s just been really stressful playing Black Ops 4 and scarfing down Little Caesar’s pizzas all the time, so I need a few weeks to refresh my spirit,” Robinson told reporters. “As much as I love my ministry sniping high schoolers in Halo and Fortnite, if I don’t take some time to myself, I’ll burn out and won’t be able to minister as well.”

He confirmed he’s going to try not to play any disc golf, Xbox games, or rounds of Chubby Bunny while he’s on sabbatical. “It’s important to give yourself downtime,” he said. “It’s tempting to keep right on ministering while you’re gone—you know, playing a few rounds of PUBG or Counter-Strike—but the key is to unplug so your thumbs are ready for some serious ministry when you get back.”

The youth pastor also confirmed he would be eating salads and drinking water to detox his spirit until the moment he returns from sabbatical, at which point it’s back to Mountain Dew Code Red and Hot N’ Ready pizzas 24/7.