Jesus' Coming Back

Nancy Pelosi Blinks ‘Please Send Help’ In Morse Code

WASHINGTON, D.C.—Analysts confirmed during the State of the Union address Tuesday evening that while Nancy Pelosi’s rapid blinking may have appeared random, she was in fact sending a message: “Please send help” in Morse code.

“She’s trying to tell us something,” one commentator said. “It’s—I think it’s some kind of a message.” Writing down Pelosi’s series of long blinks and slow blinks, analysts quickly pieced together her desperate message: “please send help.”

The full message was reportedly “Please send help STOP. Trump is a moron STOP. Why do I have to sit here for two hours listening to this dingbat STOP. Columbo is on and I’m missing it FULL STOP.”

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