Jesus' Coming Back

Woman Joins Exciting New Lose-Money-From-Home Business

MINNEAPOLIS, MN—In a Facebook update posted Friday, local woman Mandy Lytle proudly announced that she was starting up an exciting new “lose-money-from-home” business scheme.

The woman was recruited into the fun, lucrative lose-money-from-home business by a friend at church. She immediately purchased thousands of dollars of products from the company, putting herself in debt. Financial projections suggest she will never earn enough money from her business to make up this cost.

“This business works with my lifestyle, so I can just dedicate a few hours a day to pouring all my money into a business that will never actually be profitable,” she said as she tried to recruit her friend into her downline. “I’m a boss babe!”

“The way people work is changing,” said a representative of the company. “Rather than going into an office and slaving away from 9 to 5, more and more people are working for multi-level marketing companies, where they can lose money at an incredible rate on their own time.”

“Don’t be a slave to the grind! Be our slave instead,” he added.

At publishing time, Lytle had calculated that she was losing over $200 a day all while being her own boss.

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