NAZARETH—Archaeologists working near the ancient village of Nazareth confirmed Monday they have made a fascinating discovery: the blue confetti from baby Jesus’s gender reveal party.
According to historians, Mary and Joseph held a party for 300 of their closest friends and Facebook acquaintances so they could announce that they were having a baby boy.
Party attendees were asked to guess the gender and forced to play all kinds of gender reveal party games Mary found on Pinterest before the big moment. Guests were served cute, thematic blue and pink-colored punches. One exciting activity tasked guests with seeing who could change a diaper on a baby doll the fastest. Finally, after a six-hour party, Mary and Joseph fired off a giant cannon that shot blue confetti all over the guests.
“It seems the tradition of making everyone come to a party where you tell them if you’re having a boy or a girl dates to at least the first century,” Dr. Tregg Humperdinck, lead gender reveal expert at the dig site, said. “We always knew this beloved tradition wasn’t just a thing white people recently invented so they would have cute pictures to put on Instagram.”
Records indicate that although Mary and Joseph’s friends were surprised by the gender announcement, the couple had advanced, insider knowledge of the baby’s sex straight from God.
Readers of the Bee,
If just a small fraction of our visitors became subscribers, we’d have enough funding to stop running ads and reduce our dependence on big tech companies like Facebook and Google. Will you partner with us to make this possible?
Comments are closed.