FRANKLIN, TN—Popular Christian radio host Dave Ramsey has released a brand new Magic 8-Ball that always answers in the negative when you ask it if you should buy something.
Ask the Ramsey 8-Ball if you should buy that new golf club set, give it a shake, and it will respond, “Are you nuts?” Ask it if you can open up a credit card “just for the reward points,” and it will show you a drawing of Ramsey glaring at you disapprovingly.
“People kept calling into my radio show asking stupid questions about what they should buy,” Ramsey said in a product announcement video. “Now, they can just ask the Magic 8-Ball instead of clogging up my phone lines. I win, you win, we all win. Now, we can spend more time living like no one else.”
Other answers include the following:
- Stupid!
- Heck no!
- Sure, you can buy it, if you don’t want to have any money to live on in retirement.
- No. Did I stutter?
- Why are you the way that you are?
Ramsey is selling the 8-Ball for $99. He says it’s OK to make this one purchase though, since it will save you from a bunch of other unnecessary purchases
A Babylon Bee subscriber contributed to this report. If you want to get involved with the staff writers at The Babylon Bee, check out our membership options here!
Readers of the Bee,
If just a small fraction of our visitors became subscribers, we’d have enough funding to stop running ads and reduce our dependence on big tech companies like Facebook and Google. Will you partner with us to make this possible?
Comments are closed.