WESTOVER HILLS, VA—Churches have long debated the controversial lyric “sloppy wet kiss” in the song How He Loves by John Mark McMillan. Some have replaced it with the equally strange “unforeseen kiss.” Other congregations just hum the lyric awkwardly when it comes up.
But Gracefaithlife Church has come up with an even better solution.
The church will belt out the more chaste lyric, “And heaven meets earth like a sloppy wet sidehug!” whenever it sings the tune.
“It’s much more pure,” the pastor said. “Now we don’t have to sing a weird, cringy line about a sloppy wet kiss, but instead can sing a purity culture-approved line like ‘sloppy wet sidehug.'”
His face then turned to a look of horror. “Wait, that might not be any better, now that I say it out loud.”
Readers of the Bee,
If just a small fraction of our visitors became subscribers, we’d have enough funding to stop running ads and reduce our dependence on big tech companies like Facebook and Google. Will you partner with us to make this possible?
Comments are closed.