Jesus' Coming Back

Elizabeth Warren Changes Twitter Profile To Include Authentic Indian Name

WASHINGTON, D.C.—Presidential candidate Elizabeth Warren has changed her Twitter account, becoming the first Democratic candidate to put an authentic given Indian name into his or her profile.

Warren changed her account to read “She Who Stands Like Tall Tree And Cries When Blue Corn Moon Shines On Happy Badger” so there would be no confusion about how to refer to her. She considered using authentic Indian names given to her by tribes other than her native Cherokee, including “She Who Panders Like Weasel” and “White Girl,” but stuck with her original Indian name given in the teepee where she was born.

The senator also criticized other candidates who haven’t put their official Native American names on their Twitter profiles.

“My opponent Beto is too scared to put his name ‘Paleface Who Pretends To Be Brownface,’ while Bernie doesn’t have the courage to put ‘Wrinkled One Who Waves Cane At Sky’ in his profile,” she said. “Native Americans won’t truly be accepted in this country until we pander to them with our Twitter profiles.”

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