Jesus' Coming Back

Hollywood Wedding Chapel Now Offering Same-Day Divorce Services

HOLLYWOOD, CA—Catering to elite movie stars and other Hollywood celebrities, the Hollywood Love Wedding Chapel has served the community well for the past fifty years.

But the owner of the chapel, Les Spergunson, says he’s always looking for ways to innovate. His latest cutting-edge adaptation to the fast-paced Hollywood marriage market? Same-day divorces.

The wedding chapel guarantees to finalize actors and actresses’ divorces the very same day they are married, cutting out on all that pesky paperwork and all those court hearings later on.

While a celebrity couple is walking out of the building after having tied the knot, a divorce judge is standing by near the exit, ready to dissolve the marriage should the couple wish. Should they want to stay married but change their mind within 24 hours, they’re welcome to come back and get the divorce, guaranteed to work.

“Yeah, most of the couples we marry have taken this option since we introduced it,” Spergunson said. “This way you don’t have to issue some statement to your fans in three months saying your paths have diverged and you’re following your inner spirit guide and all that crap. Just get married and get divorced before the paparazzi even know what hit ’em. Bada bing, bada boom.”

As a special deal to promote the service, the chapel is offering two weddings and two divorces for the price of one.

Miley Cyrus and Liam Hemsworth have endorsed Hollywood Love Wedding Chapel and will be appearing in ads for the business, sources confirmed.

Readers of the Bee,

If just a small fraction of our visitors became subscribers, we’d have enough funding to stop running ads and reduce our dependence on big tech companies like Facebook and Google. Will you partner with us to make this possible?

Jesus Christ is King

Comments are closed.

This website uses cookies to improve your experience. We'll assume you're ok with this, but you can opt-out if you wish. Accept Read More