Financial Experts Recommend Breaking Into Your Neighbors’ Houses And Smashing All Their Pots To See If They Have Any Rupees

U.S.—As a recession seems to be looming in the nation, financial advice experts are recommending Americans prepare for the worst.

They’re advising many of the usual things, like saving money, investing smartly, and not spending $8 on one freakin’ slice of avocado toast, delicious as it may be. But they have one new piece of advice they came up with after they got together to figure out how to help stave off the recession and also might have gotten distracted and started playing The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time. 

“Just walk into random houses, smash every pot you can find, grab the rupees, and go back outside,” said Fred Mallard, financial advisor. “Then, if you don’t think you have enough money, go back inside and do it again. The pots will probably replace and refill themselves back up with rupees every time.”

Experts cautioned however that you can only do this so many times before you won’t be able to hold all the rupees and will need to get a bigger wallet. They also suggested looking for sections of walls that are slightly off-color and make a different sound when you hit them with a sword and blowing them up with a bomb to see if there are any rupees inside.

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