WASHINGTON, D.C.—Today in the nation’s capital, Congress was set to begin counting electoral votes, but was stopped by a group of Trump supporters storming the Capitol building.
“Congress was trying to count the fraudulent electoral votes and steal the election, but we stopped them just in time,” said protestor Ganther Buggo as he propped his feet up on Nancy Pelosi’s desk. “We’re in charge now!”
The protestors then invoked the little known 29th Amendment of the Constitution that says the first person to storm the Capitol while Congress is in session and stand there triumphantly shall become the next president of the United States.
According to sources, the mantle of leadership has been placed upon a guy wearing a really cool buffalo hat, since he was the first person to make it to the front of the room and strike a triumphant pose while waving the flag.
The newly elected buffalo-hat President will be announcing his cabinet members next week. Biden congratulated him on his victory and then fell back to sleep.
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