I was about three months pregnant and sitting in an abortion clinic receiving “counseling,” which meant I was reading over the forms they gave me and signing my consent. I was having second thoughts. I had had a previous abortion that still left me with nightmares, but I was desperate. I was pregnant by a man other than the guy I was living with and had three other kids. This couldn’t work out.
By the time the abortionist saw me, he told me I might be too far along to have an abortion and that another abortionist may have to do it. I figured that was what I needed to get out of there. When I pulled up my phone and opened Instagram, I saw a post from a friend from church who had had five abortions. She said she was praying for those considering abortion at that moment.
If my phone was eavesdropping or God was intervening, I got the message. After reaching out to her, she put me in touch with a group that not only saved my baby’s life, but prioritized mine as well.
The number one reason women choose abortion is money. Babies are expensive, and as they get older, the financial challenges continue. Ask any parent if raising kids is cheap and they’ll look at you like you’re from another planet. Yes, we all get it, and moms in difficult situations, where money is most certainly at the forefront of their minds, are especially prone to thinking abortion is the quick fix to their problem.
But it really isn’t. The ending of innocent life is no small matter. It’s not like just pulling a tooth or removing a gallbladder.
People Are There to Help in Every Way
Yet a million women have abortions in our country every year. Even if they were all given checks to cover their rent and buy baby clothes and diapers, that would run out — and then what? They would be right back where they started.
When I was in dire straits and pregnant with my fourth baby, my partner asked my kids and me to move out of his apartment. I was working from home but still, I needed a place to live.
Remember my friend who had five abortions? She knew of a nonprofit project called LoveLine (part of ProLove Ministries) that works with women like me, makes calls within local communities to find help and resources, and ultimately walks with women in situations like mine. They did all of this for me and I’m eternally grateful. I truly don’t know where I’d be without their help.
True Empowerment
I was given free counseling and free financial coaching, had a baby registry set up for me, and they put me in touch with a local pregnancy center who has been helping me with diapers and wipes as I’ve been going to parenting classes there and meeting other moms.
I don’t know who said this famous quote, “Give a man a fish, and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, and you feed him for a lifetime” but the wisdom is real. It’s okay to accept help, but it’s even better to learn how to manage your money, search for jobs, and understand how to navigate Medicaid. That’s empowerment. My life has completely changed because I’ve learned how to do these things and have had some pretty amazing people in my life to teach me, for which I’m eternally grateful.
I have three sons whom I love dearly. Later the same day I walked out of the abortion facility, I got a call from the OB-GYN I had seen earlier to confirm the pregnancy. She told me I’d be having a girl. A girl whom I had only dreamed about.
I don’t like to think about what would have happened if I got that call right after I had the abortion. I don’t know what the future will hold, but I do know that because of several selfless pro-life individuals through LoveLine I will make it.
I know I’m loved and cared for. I know my family is held in prayer. I know that I’m not alone. Sometimes, just knowing that you aren’t alone can make all the difference for that woman considering abortion. There is a way out.
Lydia Burns is a mom of four who lives in Florida.
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