How can a parent reflect on the legacy of a child taken from earth too soon? For Rob and Lisa Weinsoff Zenilman, whose son Ari fell in battle in the Gaza Strip in December, this had become their reality.
The couple described their son as passionate about his Jewish life, his readiness for a life in Israel, and his commitment to life here.
Through tears for the pain and smiles for the memories, the Zenilman family reflected on their journey in mourning the loss of their son in a war that has killed more than 200 soldiers since October 7.
A tragic loss
Their loss was tragic on many levels. It left Ari’s wife, Chava, a widow, with two kids and an infant; parents; multiple siblings; and countless friends to mourn the emptiness his death left.
Ari fell on December 11, after coming across a booby-trapped tunnel entrance in a Gaza building. His infantry unit was focused on securing the area for the IDF’s operations.
“They were basically playing a game of Whac-A-Mole,” Rob told The Jerusalem Post. “Terrorists pop up in different buildings, and they uncovered a building with a tunnel entrance. When they went in, it was booby-trapped. Three people from his unit were killed, along with two others and many others who were injured,” his father said.
Their loss was tragic on as many levels — leaving his wife Chava a widow, with two kids and an infant, parents, multiple siblings, and countless friends to mourn the emptiness his death left.
Ari Zenilman fell on December 11, 2023 after coming across a booby-trapped tunnel entrance in a Gaza building. His unit was focused on securing the area for the IDF’s operations, leading his team to risk their lives in the process of securing the area for the success in the IDF’s pursuit of defeating Hamas.
“They were basically playing a game of wack-a-mole,” his father Rob told The Jerusalem Post. “Terrorists pop up in different buildings, and they uncovered a building with a tunnel entrance. When they went in, it was booby-trapped. Three people from his unit were killed, along with two others and many others who were injured,” his father said.
After his untimely passing, the IDF had to immediately dispatch officers to share the devastating news. “My first thought was – ‘oh no, which one?’” His mother said. With sons serving on both of Israel’s fronts, the potential for devastation was certainly not minimal.
Officers visited his parents at the same time as trying to reach his wife — only to learn that she was not home, but visiting her parents. As dispatchers sought out his devoted and loving widow, changing her life forever, Ari’s parents heard the details of his death.
Every single detail.
They thought of their daughter-in-law Chava, and the three grandchildren they had who were now going to spend their lives without their dad, because of the senseless violence perpetrated by a terror group so vile, that when on Wednesday, April 10 lost three of his sons and three grandchildren in an Israeli airstrike, expressed “gratitude to Allah for martyring” his next-of-kin instead of protecting them at all costs.
Now, his infant daughter, born on Erev Sukkot in the days leading up to the October 7 massacre, will only learn the details of her father’s legacy through stories. She was only 10 months old when he passed.
Long before he fell in battle, Ari built a relationship with the nation he was defending.
The Zenilman family always saw making aliyah as something that they would end up doing.“We knew that if we did a good job as Jewish parents, our kids would move to Israel themselves,” Lisa told the Post while reflecting on the family’s aliyah journey.
As their children grew older, they seemed less attached to their life back in New York City’s West Side and continually drawn to the possibility of life in Israel.
“There was a point when we were in [a store] here and Ari turns to us and says, ‘So, why don’t we already live here?’ He was only nine years old at the time,” his mother said. The family would hear about others making the move to Israel, and suddenly all of their children were asking the same question – when will we be moving here?
From a young age, Ari would tell his parents that he could live anywhere in the United States, but Israel would always be best. He was always destined to live out his days in Israel, his parents told the Post.
Moving to Ma’aleh Adumim would be a crucial step in Ari’s maturity, leading him to grow up even faster. He knew that the level of independence he would have as a teenager in Israel would be unmatched compared to that of his life in New York – being able to hang out on the street and feel safe at 11 p.m. was more realistic for the family in Israel, and Ari looked forward to that independence.
“Who he was at four was the same person he was at 16,” his parents added.
From a young age, he was committed to a life in Israel. While many move to Israel and feel overwhelmed, his parents could feel his commitment to life in the Holy Land from the get-go. It didn’t take him long to tell the people he interacted with: “Only speak to me in Hebrew, please.” His commitment to Israel and the future of the nation was evident to everyone who knew him.
The friends Ari made upon starting high school in Israel would be some of the closest friends he had until he met his end in Gaza. Those friends, alongside members of his brigade, would pay their respects to his family after his death and in the months that passed.
October 7 came and went, and Ari jumped into action. He was sent to the South, while one of his brothers was sent north to the Golan Heights. Reserve service was a commitment Ari always made time for and felt committed to. He planned his schedule around his expected reserve service. Completion of his reserve duty was a major priority in his life.
According to his family, Ari was a person who continually connected with anyone visiting the Holy Land. It did not matter if it was a person he had not seen in a decade; he was going to make every effort he could to see visitors.
Keeping relationships was incredibly important to him, and he did his part to keep them as strong as possible.
Even after he was killed in Gaza, his impact on the people in his life was beyond evident. The relationship he built with his platoon was more like a brotherhood – large groups of people from his unit would pay visits to the Zenilman family, to Chava and the children. The soldiers shared stories of his bravery, his character, and of their greatest memories with their friend.
ARI LOVED to learn, whether it was Talmud or new vocabulary. He was almost never found without a holy book, or regular book for that matter.
“It’s not that he loved to teach people things – he just loved sharing the knowledge he acquired with those around him,” Lisa said.
He was a big reader. He loved fantasy stories, but that would not keep him from reading literary masterpieces such as Leo Tolstoy’s War and Peace, among other literary works.
“After the battle of Kissufim, one of the first things he asked for was his Kindle,” his father said.
As a big reader, he acquired new vocabulary through books. However, his parents fondly remember him mispronouncing words that he had learned from books, particularly at times that were less than convenient for corrections to be made.
This love for sharing knowledge shone through in every part of his life. As an employee at Mobileye, Ari was the only American on his team.
After his death, his family was brought to his workplace to meet another group whose lives he touched. As the sole American, he took it upon himself to teach a new word every day to his teammates.
Ari was creative. His family loved that he doodled characters, both original and pre-existing. He made up stories to tell his children. He spent time occasionally playing basketball, he continually learned about Judaism, and he kept up with his crew.
Ari sustained relationships throughout the years and will be remembered as a go-to point of contact for people coming from near and far. He will be remembered as a person who showed up for those he loved, as a person who inspired those around him.
Ari Zenilman will be remembered for how he encouraged those he loved to reach for the top and to do their best.
His passing was untimely – as is the death of anyone taken far too young – but his family chooses to remember more than the pain of his loss.
His mother, Lisa, eloquently said, “There are moments of life that change you forever, and there are moments that happen before.” In those moments before lays Ari Zenilman’s legacy.
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