Celebs

LOS ANGELES, CA — In an attempt to increase his credibility on the street, rapper-actor Ice Cube booked an appearance on conservative media pundit Tucker Carlson's show on Twitter (AKA "X"), thinking anyone seeing him hanging around Carlson…

TORONTO — With other ideas having failed, the family of Professor-Author-Philosopher Dr. Jordan B. Peterson made one final, desperate attempt to distract him with several cats in order to confiscate his phone."Oooh, Dad, look at this fluffy…

STAMFORD, VT — Actor Ezra Miller has been traveling house to house threatening families to see The Flash, witnesses claim. Authorities are advising residents of Bennington County to lock their doors and, if approached, to contact police…

RIVENDELL — Gandalf the White has arrived with haste at the house of Elrond, suddenly referring to himself as Gandalf the Black. According to the iced-out wizard now wearing a black robe, word on the street is that the Elves are paying out…

AUSTIN, TX — After controversial comments that spooked investors in Tesla and Twitter, Elon Musk has finally come forward to apologize to Magneto for comparing him to the dastardly villain Goerge Soros. "I would like to say I'm sorry to Max…

MAR-A-LAGO, FL — After a judge ruled Trump liable in the sexual abuse and defamation case brought by E. Jean Carroll, the former President responded by announcing he would pay the $5 million judgment using his collectible NFT trading…

WASHINGTON, D.C. — According to sources, the extremely beautiful and perfect Congresswoman AOC has still failed to notice a group of handsome and talented satire writers, even though they are really funny and have written dozens of…

NEW YORK, NY — Former CNN host Don Lemon has quickly landed on his feet after his sudden firing yesterday, as he will now have the opportunity to continue lecturing the American public from his new position as a barista at his local…

MANHATTAN, NY — With The Super Mario Bros. Movie making over $377 million globally in its first weekend alone and a projected strong second weekend from positive word-of-mouth, the franchise kickoff is already shaping up into a juggernaut.…

ST LOUIS, MO — Finding themselves in hot water with Christians and conservatives this week, Anheuser-Busch has extended an olive branch to the Christian community with its new John MacArthur edition of Bud Light.The commemorative aluminum…