Christian Living

HEAVEN—According to sources from the afterlife, Beverly Partin, who taught the 3-year-olds at her church for over 50 years, is a "total baller" in heaven. The longtime children's ministry volunteer is "living large," with a sprawling…

ATLANTA, GA—Chick-fil-A has announced a major change in the production of its delicious chicken sandwiches. The company will now be outsourcing all food production to McDonald's. According to corporate spokespeople, since the company's…

ATLANTA, GA—Chick-fil-A corporate headquarters announced Friday that the restaurant will be getting a new mascot in place of the traditional Chick-fil-A cow: a golden calf. Restaurant patrons will be asked to dance around and worship the…

Persecuted Church In China Praying For American Believers Who Aren't Sure Where They Can Get A Good Christian Chicken Sandwich Anymore CHINA—Christians in China have joined together in lifting up their American brothers and sisters in…

Nation's Christian Husbands Pray Hobby Lobby Would Do Something Worthy Of A Boycott OKLAHOMA CITY, OK—Christian men’s group “50,000 Fathers” has started a prayer petition to end the tyranny and torture of wives forcing them to go to Hobby…

U.S.—Well, this can't be good. After Chick-fil-A caved to the LGBTQ lobby and agreed to stop donating money to certain Christian organizations, the lemonade at various Chick-fil-A locations immediately began turning into blood. "Uh, boss,…

U.S.—As America eagerly awaits Friday’s theatrical release of Frozen 2, the much-anticipated sequel to Disney’s hit animated film Frozen, parents across the nation have been seen buying up earplugs in large quantities. The cartoon…

Chick-Fil-A Trades Adoring Christian Fans For Outraged Mob That Won't Be Appeased Until Their Every Demand Is Met U.S.—Chick-fil-A has said it will stop making donations to Christian groups that oppose the LGBTQ movement. The move is said…

STONEWALL, LA—A new children's Bible released by IFB Life Publishing depicts Eve wearing a "historically accurate" denim skirt, sensible neck-covering polo shirt, and $13 Walmart sneakers. Adam is depicted without a shirt and standing…

Chick-Fil-A Employee Throws Down Staff Which Turns Into Snake Eating Popeyes' False Serpents FRESNO, CA—In a meager attempt to establish his restaurant as the chicken-sandwich powerhouse, a Popeyes manager went into a nearby Chick-fil-A…