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conservatismintheunitedstates

The Onion’s Exclusive Interview With Tucker Carlson

Tucker Carlson: Look, do I want to murder Donald Trump? Strangle him? Beat him? Stab him hundreds of times, fuck his corpse, and then stab him even more until he’s completely unrecognizable and I’m covered in his blood and viscera? Yes. But…

Fox News Viewers React To Tucker Carlson’s Exit

“This is a HUGE victory for American PATRIOTS…somehow. Because now Tucker can FINALLY SAY WHAT HE WANTS, which I guess he wasn’t doing before? Honestly, it seemed like he pretty much did and said whatever he wanted and it worked out pretty…

Most Controversial Statements By CPAC Speakers

“Wow, a speaker at CPAC. Pretty incredible, right? Guess Freaky Lauren isn’t such a freak after all, huh? All these important people seem to think I’m cool enough to talk at CPAC. Maybe everyone I knew growing up were the freaks? They’re…

Conservatives Explain Why They Oppose Drag Shows

In the wake of Republicans across the country passing legislation to ban the performances, The Onion asked conservatives why they oppose drag shows and this is what they said.Advertisement2 / 24Frank Jones, PastorList slidesFrank Jones,

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