Monkeypox curls single protein spike as man wishes to “stop hearing about COVID”
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COVID
Experts admit world just going to have to learn to live with seasonal outbreaks of Vladimir Putin
GENEVA – In a long expected admission by assembled health and safety representatives, citizens of countries across the world have been informed that we are all just going to have to endure regular, periodic outbreaks of Vladimir Putin.
“At…
Breaking: Anti-mandate protesters actually like, OBSESSED with mandates
OTTAWA – With mask and vaccine mandates being lifted nationwide, anti-mandate protesters like Chad McCarthy of Red Deer, Alberta, are starting to realize despite their outward hatred, deep down they are actually totally obsessed with…
End of COVID celebrated by blasting immunocompromised people out of circus cannons
TORONTO – Grateful Canadians are gathering each evening to celebrate the conclusion of the deeply unpopular COVID-19 pandemic with the 7:00 pm launch of immunocompromised people from circus cannons.
“Now that this nightmare’s finally over,…
COVID enters 6th wave despite clearly running out of ideas by Wave 3
OTTAWA — The Public Health Agency of Canada confirmed today that the country is now in the 6th wave of the COVID-19 pandemic signaled by the all too familiar pattern of climbing case numbers. While Wave 6 still has yet to fully unfold, many…
“100,000 cases a day totally worth this,” thinks man walking maskless into KFC
Oshawa, ON – Local man Dalton Framer took time to savour the fact that he was finally allowed to walk into a crowded KFC without a mask, regardless of the fact that Ontario is currently facing 100,000 cases a day of COVID.
“Before the…
Employer successfully schedules return to office for peak of new COVID wave yet again
TORONTO – Local consulting firm J.P. Binderschlatz & Co. has once again asked it’s 40 employees to return to work in-office right at the peak of the latest COVID wave.
“We’ve been mostly remote since March 2020,” explained assistant…
Ontario Conservatives pass law banning people from posting positive COVID tests on social media
TORONTO – As part of their ‘don’t say anything about a 6th wave or we’ll cut you’ approach to managing COVID, Doug Ford and the Conservatives announced a full ban on sharing photos of positive rapid tests.
“Seeing almost everyone you know…
Why Justin Trudeau being criticized by three far-right European politicians proves Canada’s…
By: Armond DeFrame
Remember when Canada was respected? Before Justin Trudeau took a woke hammer and shattered the glass of our international reputation? I sure do. I remember when Canadian politicians could travel anywhere in the world and…
Report: wanting COVID to be over and it actually being over technically two different things
TORONTO – As provinces around the country abandon vaccine and mask mandates, a shocking new report has concluded that just because we’d all like the pandemic to be over, doesn’t actually make it so.
“Just like every Premier we initially…
Play Hard. Get Dirty. Use Good Saop.