creation myths

THE HEAVENS—Sipping on a Diet Coke as He described the mix of alcohol and pills He had lived off of for years, a newly sober God admitted Tuesday that He had no recollection of creating the universe. “Everyone tells Me I made light and…

THE HEAVENS—In a statement addressed to individuals at risk of having their access to life on earth permanently revoked, God, the Almighty Creator, confirmed Monday that He would soon delete millions of humans due to inactivity. “To my dear…