creative works

The family of Malcolm X have released a former police officer’s written deathbed confession that implicates the NYPD and FBI in the 1965 assassination of the Black nationalist leader. What do you think?“Big deal. The NYPD murders people all…

ORLANDO, FL—Sobbing that it was supposed to be her special day at the newspaper comic–themed water park, 27-year-old bride Clarissa Manks told reporters Friday that her bridesmaid ruined the entire Universal Studios Toon Lagoon bachelorette…

VANCOUVER, WA—Unable to shake off an overall negative feeling he couldn’t attribute to anything in particular, local man Paul Carpenter confirmed Monday that something about the way society was exposed as a complete illusion over the past…

BOSTON, MA—Eyes darting across the chat window as they strained to divide their attention between the speakers, Certech Consulting employees reportedly watched in horror during a Monday morning video meeting as two coworkers who began…

ATLANTA—Urging the public in the strongest possible terms to avoid the hypothetical armaments, health officials across the country issued a statement Tuesday warning against getting zapped by any sort of futuristic space gun. “We recommend…

LOS ANGELES—Visibly exhausted from his hours-long binge, Christopher Nolan was reportedly still no closer to understanding the end of Tenet Tuesday after watching dozens of YouTube explainer videos. “Wait, so what the hell was that…

WASHINGTON—Vowing to provide the State Department with the funding and resources it required to pursue his administration’s goals, President Joe Biden announced “I want to go see those mountains where it looks like Avatar” in a speech…

GALÁPAGOS ISLANDS, ECUADOR—Looking forward to exploring a new chapter of her storied 60-year career, Jane Goodall issued a statement Friday announcing she’s all about lizards now. “Gila monsters, bearded dragons, Komodo dragons, Nile…