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FLOYD, VA—Unlatching the tailgate and shooing the senior California senator out of the truck bed, President Joe Biden reportedly sped away in his pickup Thursday after dropping Dianne Feinstein off in an empty field. “You stay right there,…

WASHINGTON—Looking for a fun diversion on a boring Wednesday afternoon, a group of high-powered D.C. lobbyists reportedly paid a couple senators five bucks to fight each other. “Here it is, a crisp fiver to the winner—now fight, you fucking…

President Joe Biden delivered his second State of the Union address to the nation last night. The Onion looks at the highlights of the president’s speech.CCOffEnglishRaised interest rates 0.25% in response to boosMade repeated, unexplained…

WASHINGTON—Holding the book up so everyone in the House chamber could see the pictures, President Joe Biden read about how “the scary balloon popped” and everyone “went back to worrying about the Recession Monster” as he shared an…