Doug Ford

QUEEN’S PARK – With Ontario’s hospitals reporting emergency room closures and critical nursing shortages, Premier Doug Ford has announced a new relief plan allowing patients to diagnose themselves following a self-serve model. The plan…

Langley, BC – Local man Eric Anderson is confident that, even if he becomes Conservative leader, Pierre Poilievre’s extreme right-wing positions will make him totally unelectable, despite saying the exact same thing about nearly every…

OTTAWA – Reaching across all 3 levels of Government, the leaders of Canada’s national, provincial, and big city governments have reached a historic deal allowing them to shift the blame for record housing prices and inflation instability…

TORONTO – Ontario Premier Doug Ford has emerged from his secret underground laboratory to announce his successful creation of a new breed of mayor with the strength, speed, agility and superhuman powers heretofore unseen in mayors.…

CALEDON, ON – Public reaction to this week’s provincial election results has been mixed, save for one local man who is thrilled to watch the slow decimation of Ontario’s wetlands. “I couldn’t be happier to see the province’s stinky weird…

TORONTO – After swearing they were done with him and everything he offers, the province of Ontario has come crawling back to its dealer for another taste. “Hey man! You holding any highway construction or development permits today,” said…

TORONTO – Ontario NDP Leader Andrea Horwath and Liberal Leader Steven Del Duca celebrated the defeat of each others parties in the 2022 Ontario election. As results were reported last night, partisans and supporters cheered in relief that…

BURLINGTON, ON – Local data engineer Chris Chen has spent weeks insisting to friends how worried he is about the upcoming US midterm elections, all without ever acknowledging the Ontario provincial election happening today. “With the rising…

By: Doug Ford Look, there is no one more surprised than me that Ontario has apparently liked what I’ve done over the last 4 years. I never thought I was going to win in the first place. One second there was a CTV news article about Patrick…

TORONTO – In the wake of over 4,500 long term care deaths during Ontario’s COVID-19 crisis the provincial Conservative Government is thankful that, despite losing thousands of older PC-leaning voters, they’re still probably going to win…