Elon Musk

Just days after taking over Twitter and firing a slew of top executives, Elon Musk announced Friday afternoon that the company will be forming a “content moderation council with widely diverse viewpoints,” and that “no major…

AUSTIN, TX – In a move that surprised no one paying attention, billionaire baby daddy Elon Musk has shown as much long term interest in Twitter as he does in his nine children (that we know of). “The thought of owning Twitter and forcing my…

L.A. – Consumer reports indicate that BMW and Tesla are still the top vehicle choices for wealthy pieces of shit. “BMW has historically dominated the trust fund douchebag demographic,” said analyst Laurie Demarcus. “But ever since these…

World’s richest edgelord Elon Musk has reached a deal to buy twitter. While the deal still needs shareholder approval, it is likely to go through. Here are the 5 biggest changes Musk will make once he takes over. 1. Donald Trump will get…

It’s been a wild week for free speech; or free-speech-control, at least. That’s because while most Americans don’t care about Twitter, our society’s broader social media habits (and their frequent exaggerations) means that control of it…

SAN FRANCISCO – After Tesla CEO and richest man alive Elon Musk’s bid to buy controlling shares of Twitter succeeded, the app subsequently burst into flames and began ramming nearby pedestrians. The proposed deal from Musk totalled $46.5…

VANCOUVER – Noted space vacationer and inventor of the world’s doucheiest car Elon Musk publicly criticized Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg for holding too much social and political influence at a recent TED conference. Musk, who…

SAN FRANCISCO — Tech billionaire Elon Musk launched a hostile takeover of Twitter today shortly after becoming the company’s single largest shareholder. While the social media platform’s future is currently unknown, what is certain is that…

AUSTIN, TX — On the heels of news that Elon Musk had become Twitter’s single largest shareholder, Tesla Motors has unveiled a new safety feature requiring the driver to demonstrate being capable of operating the vehicle by retweeting one of…

AUSTIN, TX – Sources close to Elon Musk and Grimes have confirmed that the two are separating after Musk confessed that he “needs more time and space – specifically, outer space.” “I told Grimes I’m not the kind of man who can be tied down…