Food

WASHINGTON, DC – The U.S. National Institute of Health has issued a statement outlining their concerns that, despite a growing public appetite to devour the rich, people still aren’t consuming the recommended daily allowance of…

ROCHESTER, NY — Sandra Armbruster, head of marketing for French’s, announced the launch of its newest product, namely bottles filled with the watery squirts that blurp out when people first squeeze out mustard. “We asked customers for…

This fall, I attended a “chuckwagon” dinner and show with some family members in the Black Hills. I have decades of experience at big family celebrations, and never in my life have I witnessed such a miracle of people-moving efficiency…

SARNIA — Local pescatarian Chelsea Duke has vowed to taste the flesh of every known sea creature, and authorities warn that she should be considered armed and dangerous. “Ms. Duke is believed to be carrying an oyster knife and may be in…

TORONTO – The nation was stunned and confused this week after the actions taken by two pillars of Canadian society resulted in the disorienting feeling that Tim Hortons is now a more reputable institution than Hockey Canada. “Tim Hortons…

TORONTO – In a bold new move, restaurants are adding the option to tip your server’s whole salary. After successful tipping increases to 20% and even 30%, business owners decided to keep it going and externalize all their labour costs.…

TORONTO — Each August food merchants at the CNE try to outdo each other with a new wild snack. Previous years have seen runaway hits with things like the spaghetti donut and ketchup-flavored ice cream. But 2022’s standout item may be the…

EDMONTON – According to local sources, the diners at Pirate Pete’s Pasta Paradise are noticing that the restaurant’s elaborate theme menu burns through all its good ideas in its first half. “The menu opens with the elaborate tale of…

Summer in Edmonton – synonymous with warmth, sunshine, and idling vehicles. To help you take full advantage of this season, we rank the best patios for maximal exhaust exposure. 1. Julio’s Barrio Long-time residents know Julio’s from its…

TRENTON, ON – After buying an air fryer over a year ago, Bobby and Muriel Fuller regret this latest appliance purchase has failed to save their marriage after a string of attempts with other novelty gadgets. Their desperate need to…