foods

Thieves stole the catalytic converter from the iconic Oscar Mayer Wienermobile while it was parked overnight during a promotional visit for the Super Bowl in Las Vegas last week. What do you think?“So that’s what hot dogs are made of.”Max…

SEATTLE—In a study that warns frequent snackers carry a higher risk of developing the condition, new research published Monday by orthopedists at the University of Washington revealed that one in every 20 Americans will develop carpal…

NEW YORK—In a move designed to make the curriculum more palatable to conservatives, the College Board announced Thursday that its revised AP African American Studies course would focus mostly on Herman Cain’s rise to CEO of a pizza…

At this point, you likely won’t be able to get close to this burger without gagging, not only because of the near-complete putrefaction, but from the dawning realization of all this time and energy you’ve poured into watching it. Just…

DAYTON, OH—In an effort to extend his compliments to the alluring shopper after she caught his eye, local man Andrew Williamson reportedly bought a slice of honey-roasted ham Thursday for the attractive woman at the other end of the deli…

Pizza Hut has broken the world record for the world’s largest pizza, making a nearly 14,000 square-foot New York-style pizza capable of serving 68,000 slices. What do you think?“Good luck finding thousands of people willing to eat Pizza…

PLANO, TX—In the wake of a year-long investigation by the IRS, a 43-page indictment was unsealed in federal court Friday, confirming Pizza Hut CEO Aaron Powell had been charged with multiple counts of stuffing assets into offshore crusts.…

LINCOLN, NE—Noting the low attack rates among modern corn, a study published Friday by researchers at the University of Nebraska found that early humans selectively bred corn to be less aggressive. “Though ingenuity and careful breeding,…

HEBRON, WEST BANK—Lamenting the loss of his favorite summer treat, Israeli soldier Avi Berman told reporters Friday that patrolling the West Bank just wasn’t the same without a big cone of Chunky Monkey in his hand. “I used to spend all…

JERUSALEM—Following the ice cream manufacturer’s decision to stop selling its products in occupied Palestinian territory, Israel escalated tensions Thursday by closing its embassy inside Ben & Jerry’s factory. “Ben & Jerry’s hostile…