God

What does Kamala Harris believe, and why does she believe it? It’s a harder question to answer than one might think for someone who has been in national-level politics for almost a decade, and state politics for almost fifteen years before…

THE HEAVENS—Sipping on a Diet Coke as He described the mix of alcohol and pills He had lived off of for years, a newly sober God admitted Tuesday that He had no recollection of creating the universe. “Everyone tells Me I made light and…

The thing about The Return of the King is that the king, well, returns. Despite his professed love for J.R.R. Tolkien’s work, David French seems to have missed this aspect of Tolkien’s conclusion to The Lord of the Rings. Writing for…

The following was republished with permission from Armas. The coup d’état against President Biden illuminates the themes exposited in the essay on Sen. J.D. Vance’s thought and rhetoric, to which I refer the…

It’s clear by now that the U.S. Secret Service is not a very elite security detail. Random, weaponless rallygoers paid more serious attention to the would-be assassin before he fired than the allegedly professional team assigned to Donald…

THE HEAVENS—Begging the deliverymen to stay while He figured something out, the Lord God Almighty cursed loudly Thursday after He reportedly realized the gates of heaven were not wide enough for His new couch to fit through. “Are you…

The small Catholic city of Mandeville, Louisiana, will be hosting its first-ever “pride” parade on June 1, and a group of men in the community is rising up to peacefully dissent. According to local farmer and father of five Ross McKnight, “…

I don’t, as a rule, listen to podcasts. Not because I am uninterested or have nothing to learn from others, it’s just that in a crowded marketplace where originality is so rare and the theft of intellectual property is, even unwittingly, so…

IQUITOS, PERU—Disappointed by the limitations of the psychotropic medicine, an ayahuasca-tripping God, Our Lord and Heavenly Father, told reporters Tuesday how underwhelmed He was to see Himself. “I don’t know what I was expecting, but I…

THE HEAVENS—Saying He did not expect the species to forgive Him, a tearful God, Our Lord and long-supposed Heavenly Father, admitted to reporters Tuesday that He kidnapped human beings 4,000 years ago to raise them as His own children. “I’m…