graduation

I did a lot of stupid things in college. Skipping my commencement ceremony on the National Mall is not one of them. As the class of 2024 prepares for another wave of ceremony cancellations this year, here’s some advice: skip them. “I’m in…

In a commencement address at Georgia Tech over the weekend, Kansas City Chiefs kicker Harrison Butker left graduates with “one controversial antidote that I believe will have a lasting impact for generations to come.” “Get married and start…

CALGARY – As universities around Canada conclude their academic year, thousands upon thousands of young men named Bryce are graduating from their respective business schools. “I can’t wait to begin contributing to shareholder value,” said…

Oh hell, we really did it this time. We were asked to give a speech at the graduation of a local high school and carelessly ended it with a generic encouraging statement about how they can achieve anything they wanted. How would we know…

Graduation season is upon us, and anyone who’s sat through one of those fucking interminable things knows that graduation speeches can make or break an event. The Onion offers tips for writing a memorable graduation…