Halloween

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CROPSEYVILLE, NY—Frantically searching the internet for ideas, local man Jared Walker told reporters Thursday he always waits until the last minute to decide what he’ll end up sitting alone in his house dressed up as for Halloween. “Every…

EVANSTON, IL—Tossing and turning to no avail, local man Sam King was seen squirming around Thursday as his wife placed him in a Halloween costume against his will. “Be a big boy and put it on,” wife Bridget King said as she tried to wrestle…

“I went as the concept of gun control, because that’s really scary to me. But I never really figured out the costume beyond stripping off all my clothes, taping over my mouth with duct tape, and carrying a loaded AR-15. They didn’t like…

Start SlideshowCarving jack-o’-lanterns from pumpkins is one of the most fun and rewarding Halloween activities. The Onion offers tips for pumpkin carving that will make your jack-o’-lantern the envy of the…

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For many of you, it never left. For those involved in Catholic, Lutheran, Anglican, and other denominations that have kept to liturgy, you have been enjoying the long-held tradition of Advent since the 4th century. Not so for me.…

This fall, I attended a “chuckwagon” dinner and show with some family members in the Black Hills. I have decades of experience at big family celebrations, and never in my life have I witnessed such a miracle of people-moving efficiency…

QUEEN’S PARK – While invoking the Notwithstanding Clause to prevent CUPE education workers from striking, Premier Ford appeared dressed in the most terrifying Halloween costume he could imagine: The Canadian Charter of Rights and Freedoms.…

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