hims

SAN FRANCISCO—Describing the new service as a “game changer” for its most loyal customers, telehealth company Hims opened a brick-and-mortar brothel Wednesday with the aim of boosting men’s confidence. “Hims is proud to launch its…

SAN FRANCISCO—In an effort to better cater to its target market, telehealth company Hims has reportedly begun selling bags of chips for depressed, impotent losers who are also hungry. “Experiencing anxiety? ED? A rumble in your tummy? Hims…

WASHINGTON—In a historic ruling, the U.S. Supreme Court declared Tuesday that Americans have the right to roofies. “A sexual predator’s right to Rohypnol is an issue of personal liberty that must not be infringed upon,” said Justice Brett…

SAN FRANCISCO—Emphasizing the extra steps it took to ensure the sex lives of its customers remained public, telehealth company Hims announced a new indiscreet shipping option Thursday that alerts neighbors to an impending erection. “With…

SAN FRANCISCO—Emphasizing that the product was simple to use and incredibly easy to order through their mobile app, telehealth brand Hims announced Thursday that it would begin offering a new dunce cap for men who can’t get hard. “Starting…