hospitality recreation

GREEN BAY, WI—In an act demonstrating clear confidence and pride in his own worth, self-respecting man Evan Landry reportedly heated up his leftovers from Garcia’s Mexican Restaurant in the microwave on Monday. “I could just dig into this…

SEYMOUR, IN—Expressing astonishment over her husband’s about-face regarding the root vegetable, local mother Connie Keeley reportedly told her children Monday that she was proud of their father, Paul, 56, for trying a sweet potato. “You…

EUGENE, OR—Warning the 32-year-old man that you couldn’t trust anyone nowadays, local mom Sandy Fremont reportedly begged her adult son on Thursday to “be careful” while going to use a restaurant bathroom. “Please, son, I know you’re…

KNOXVILLE, TN—Using his vomit to carefully connect the dots, local hungover man Dennis Moen reportedly pieced together his previous night on Thursday by what he was throwing up. “Okay, so I must have stopped at a hot dog stand at some…

FORT LIBERTY, NC—As he signed and muttered, “Here we go again,” 13-year-old Army brat Logan Crawshaw was reportedly kicking himself Tuesday after learning his family would be moving just as he was getting comfortable with a new regional…

The FBI shot and killed Craig Deleeuw Robertson, a Utah man who was suspected of threatening President Biden ahead of his planned trip to the state, with the incident occurring when special agents attempted to serve arrest and search…

A driver in Pennsylvania crashed their car into the second floor of a house, with photos from the scene showing the side of the vehicle lodged into the home with its back wheels dangling off the roof. What do you think?“I celebrate not that…

TAMPA, FL—In an effort to squeeze in all their usual activities during their annual visit to Tampa Bay, 43-year-old Ron Ortega told reporters Tuesday he had scheduled family fights into this year’s vacation itinerary. “We’re going to be…

AUSTIN, TX—Claiming he would be totally free to come out once the party died down, local man Dan Gorski informed his wealthier friends Monday that he would love to meet up after everyone was done having fun. “If you’re still hanging out…

SACRAMENTO, CA—In an effort to abide by emergency conservation measures issued by the State Water Resources Control Board, golf courses in California have been forced to use insulin to maintain their fairways and greens, sources confirmed…