human interest

KENOSHA, WI—Insisting that they would not be daunted in their hunt for this vitally needed information, the nation’s nieces gathered Friday to announce that they would keep asking where your ex was every time you visit. “We remain resolute…

THE HEAVENS—Saying He was surprised and intrigued by the sudden new insight into His divine heritage, the Lord God Almighty told reporters Thursday He had recently learned He was 25% Puerto Rican. “I honestly had no idea, but it turns out…

“Well… Oh God, I can’t do this. Rosario, if you’re seeing this, I miss you so much. Give me another chance—I’ll do better. I’ll take my pants all the way off when we make love, rather than pulling them up even higher. We don’t have to eat…

POUGHKEEPSIE, NY—Going about his daily life completely oblivious to his exceptional gift, area man Daniel Clark remains tragically unaware that he possesses one of the top five most beautiful assholes in America, sources confirmed Thursday.…

LOS ANGELES—In a groundbreaking series that includes shocking close-ups of the 28-year-old subject eating a bowl of Froot Loops on the couch, the TLC television network premiered a new show this week that stars Benjamin Neufeld, a man who…

According to a study published in Nature, the nausea and vomiting in the first trimester of pregnancy experienced by more than two-thirds of women are caused by one hormone called GDF15, with the amount of that hormone correlating directly…

NEW YORK—In town to promote its most recent film, the prehistoric reptilian beast known as Godzilla shared an anecdote about a recent Tokyo shopping trip during an appearance Monday on The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon. “Well, I’d…

Start SlideshowTake this test to see if you possess the arrogance, stubbornness, and shortsightedness to be a baby boomer capable of screwing over future generations.AdvertisementPrevious SlideNext SlideQ: In the early days of TV, how would…

PLANO, TX—Puzzled by the revelation that the famous rapper was one of 34 people the woman followed on the social media app, sources confirmed Monday that it was unclear if local mother Teresa Poletti was intentionally following Machine Gun…

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