human interest

Tinder, whose parent company Match Group also owns OKCupid and Hinge, will be introducing an in-app feature later this year that performs background checks on potential dates to flag any violent crimes. What do you think?“Well, it would be…

SALEM, OR—Wistfully recalling the hours spent running and jumping around the machine’s high-powered, motorized blades, local mother Jessica Halpern told reporters Friday she missed the good old days when you could let kids run free on a…

A New York man was ordered to pay a $5,000 fine for illegal possession with intent to sell seven sandbar sharks discovered in an above-ground pool he kept in his basement. What do you think?“All I know is that I promised my son a shark for…

I, Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh, have faced countless challenges throughout my decades-long career. As a member of the British Royal Family and a representative of The Crown, I have survived two World Wars, the formation of the European…

CORPUS CHRISTI, TX—Finally stopping to consider the weight of the allegations after another massage therapist came forward, the 14th sexual assault lawsuit filed against Deshaun Watson Tuesday forced Texans fan Blaine Rockwell to reckon…

SPARTA, OH—Dismayed that such a beloved figure would risk tarnishing her image for a few bucks, local viewer Rodney O’Toole expressed confusion Friday about why a big celebrity like the Green M&M would stoop to doing a commercial. “It…

A mass shooting on Tuesday that left eight people dead at businesses in the Atlanta area has prompted discussion about the shooter’s motivations and the rise of anti-Asian sentiment in the U.S. The Onion looks at what you need to know about…

EVANSTON, IL—Talking quietly over the music as they indulged in the swanky atmosphere, diners at local eatery Rinaldo’s Kitchen told reporters Friday they had come for the award-winning cuisine but were sticking around for the delightful…

The IRS has postponed the tax filing deadline to May 17, allowing filers an extra month to navigate any issues from the pandemic while the agency also grapples with a backlog of 24 million unprocessed 2019 returns. What do you…

MEMPHIS, TN—Citing the complications that a sexual relationship inevitably brings, officials at the Memphis Zoo confirmed Monday that giant pandas Ya Ya and Le Le had not mated because they were both worried about messing up their…