kids

French Digital Minister Jean-Noel Barrot announced Monday that the French government would block access to online pornography for minors. “I intend to put an end to this scandal,” he said. “In 2023, it is the end of access to pornography…

OLD TOWN OF YORK – Look, I’m not someone who rises from the grave easily. I’m just a normal taxpayer like anyone else. I keep my head down, visit the dying, scare cats, and I don’t get excited about things that don’t concern me. But someone…

There’s a joke about being a Gen X kid versus being a Gen Z kid. The Gen Z kid is preparing to leave the house and his parents say, “Take your phone. Text me when you get there. Text me the names of who you’re with. Text me before you head…

Windsor, ON – Jacob Framer, a man who should never in a million years be allowed to care for young children, has recently been heard encouraging various friends and family members to procreate. “Oh man you gotta have kids, it’s the best,”…

TORONTO – Premier Doug Ford clarified today that Ontario’s young students remain too young to learn the proper names for genitalia but are definitely mature enough to be used as political pawns part of the government’s war on Unions. “Kids…

By: Lester Bueller As the media throws up yet another hissy fit over Doug Ford and Stephen Lecce using the Notwithstanding Clause yet again I just have to say: I don’t care. Ford and Lecce can trample every single Charter right under the…

EDMONTON – Local data analyst Rolly Crowne, who is well known for his exhaustive knowledge about the various age of consent laws in different states, provinces, and countries, recently noted to his co-workers that “Drag Queen story time is…

EDMONTON – Eight-year-old Mason Wright and seven-year-old Olivia Glass have been busy playing house all afternoon by pretending to have their hearts set on a property, only for Mason’s imaginary friend Gerald to swoop in and take it from…

Brantford, ON – This morning adorable toddler Liam O’Reilly, 3, declared that Daylight Saving Time was a fucking joke and he would arise at his normal hour, even if that was technically now in the middle of the night. “Daylight Saving Time…

OTTAWA – Pfizer and BioNTech have released preliminary data to Health Canada stating that a vaccine for children ages 5 to 11 years could be available sooner than originally thought. Side effects of this, of course, would mean you might…