Life

KINGSPORT, TN — According to sources, a local man was seen at the store carrying a grocery basket like a dainty village girl skipping through the orchard picking apples."I just needed to get a few items!" the man said to reporters,…

SALINA, KS — Local man Jared Halderman reportedly went through a period of confused bewilderment after realizing he was unsure whether the band Mumford & Sons actually existed or if he had just imagined it."I could've sworn I've…

PLANO, TX — Local seven-year-old Benjamin Gunther was outed as a homeschooler after he looked an adult directly in the eyes while speaking in complete sentences.The incident occurred at a barber shop, when the barber called him back for…

LEGOLAND, CA — Representatives from LEGO gathered at Legoland in San Diego to unveil a new series of building sets called ‘California Home' that requires kids to fill out building permits and wait two years before starting construction."We…

U.S. — State Farm has begun offering optional extra car insurance coverage for protection against customers' cars being torched by psychotic weirdos with purple hair.In addition to having the flexibility to add protection against hail,…

Champions of assisted reproductive technology (ART) have long defended the fertility industry and its mass destruction and abandonment of countless embryos created through in vitro fertilization (IVF) cycles. When the Alabama Supreme Court…

U.S. — Google Maps has added a new feature in its latest update which will offer drivers a shortcut to their destination, but through a route guaranteed to make them fear for their lives.While Google Maps has often taken unsuspecting…

Nothing beats great Chinese food, but how can you tell if the restaurant you just walked into is legit? Here are nine things to look for:Name of restaurant is something clever like "CHINESE FOOD": Off to a promising start.Door has a bell…

LOS ANGELES, CA — While waiting in line at the Department Of Motor Vehicles, local man Roger Stephens had the chance to experience trainee Sarah Taylor's very first day on the job, watch her advance in years, and celebrate her…

VIRGINIA BEACH, VA — Local single woman Michelle Denton continues to be perpetually stressed out as she sadly has no man around to tell her to relax.While all of her married friends live in peace and harmony due to their husbands…