Life

GROVELAND, IL - Pierce County's District Attorney has opened prosecution against an eight-year-old boy who reportedly terrorized two burglars robbing his parents' mansion.The young boy by the name of Kevin McAllister was apparently home…

Thanks to a study that went viral on social media, the world learned this past week about 'menu anxiety' - which is apparently the fear of having to order food off a menu. As it turns out, the vast majority of Generation Z suffers from menu…

HUTCHINSON, KS — A local couple's first night out together in months got off to a rocky start, as a man took his wife out to dinner at a very expensive restaurant only to be left disappointed after learning the McFlurry machine was…

PALM BEACH, FL — According to sources, local man Chet Bivley is enjoying a cigar with his friends at the local cigar lounge and has just mentioned how much he loves it, despite the fact that he will soon be puking all his guts out into a…

SEATTLE, WA — As part of an ongoing corporate initiative to show solidarity with the Palestinian people and support anti-Zionist liberation efforts, kiosks at the global coffee chain Starbucks will now ask customers if they would like to…

Federal law prohibits the use of taxpayer dollars to fund ending life in the womb, but a new report from the U.S. Government Accountability Office (GAO) says the federal government shelled out Americans’ hard-earned money to subsidize the…

SCHENECTADY, NY — Members of the Pendleton family are reported to have been in a state of emergency since 8:37 this morning, the moment Grandma learned how to "like" text messages. Since then, every member of the entire extended family has…

WASHINTON, D.C. — In a startling new study reviewed by Congress, it was revealed that a staggering 3 million Americans lost their lives last year fishing around in the crack of their seats while driving for lost Chick-fil-A waffle…

SHREVEPORT, LA — According to sources, local husband and father Ben Arnold converted to the Jehovah's Witness religion in a daring gambit to avoid putting up Christmas lights this season."Sorry, no can do," Arnold told his wife. "I'm a…

BOISE, ID — The Babylon Bee has officially announced its person of the year: housewife Christina Meyers, 34, of Boise Idaho.Meyers is the mom of four young children, wife to Dave, and caretaker of a lovely one-story home. She spends most of…