Life

NEW YORK CITY, NY — Sources close to Levi Greenbaum confirmed that the 8-day-old Jewish newborn was "very excited" for a super cool party that his parents were throwing for him today, but became slightly uneasy after noticing a sharp metal…

Men are famous for not sharing their feelings, so how can anyone be sure men have friends, let alone best friends?The Babylon Bee has put together the following list of clear signs guys are best buds:Address each other with "Bro" or "Hey,…

OMAHA, NE — Local meteorologists have predicted large and dangerous storms to roll in later this evening, which means — heck yes — there is still plenty of time for you and your family to post up on the front porch to witness the…

Some of the biggest players in the national pro-life movement are justifiably frustrated with the ambiguous abortion rhetoric plaguing former President Donald Trump’s 2024 campaign. As Election Day draws nearer, however, those committed to…

Amid an ongoing national conversation around IVF after Alabama’s Supreme Court ruling, attempts by both Republicans and Democrats to “protect IVF,” and Tim Walz’s Stolen Vitro controversy, the Dallas Morning News published, “I’m a pro-life…

BOISE, ID — A local family's daily routine proceeded as usual today, as a mom dropped her kids off at daycare so she could head to the second job that she works to make enough money to pay for daycare.Jenna Reese dropped off her two young…

BLOOMINGTON, MN — Sources close to Matthias Johnson have just confirmed that the 46-year old middle manager at Rockington Solutions, Inc managed to keep winning friends and influencing people by simply adding a friendly "LOL" to the end of…

EXCELSIOR SPRINGS, MO — An otherwise non-descript morning was made exponentially better for a local man today, as he woke up from an awesome dream in which he was on Jeopardy and the final clue was "This monkey-lizard creature sat next to…

EARTH — In a groundbreaking new revelation, God clarified that committing murder is OK if the person sitting next to you on an airplane takes off their shoes.The stunning news came from one of Heaven's representatives, confirming to mankind…

ARVADA, CO — A recent scan of 15-year-old Bridger Cannon shows his body is made up of over 97 percent Flamin' Hot Cheetos."It's a medical anomaly, but not unheard of," explained Dr. Harold Barrus. "After reviewing the x-ray, we determined…