Lifestyle

KINGMAN, AZ — An adult male is reportedly still using the phrase "cool beans" despite the current year being 2023, sources say. Dallas Woodrow, an Arizona native, shocked co-workers at Desert Burro Ltd. when he used the term to acknowledge…

Our effeminate culture keeps trying to push men to talk about their feelings and go to something lame-sounding called "therapy". While this might work for today's beta male, old-school, 100% genuine REAL men have better ways of overcoming…

SCARBOROUGH — After decades of the question being asked by frustrated bar patrons, the identity of the man whose dick you have to suck to get a drink around here has been definitively identified as Marty Williams, produce clerk at a Sobey’s…

CYPRESS, CA — Members of a local gym were shocked and distracted today after a woman — who was clearly new and not familiar with the expected attire of exercising females — spent her entire workout actually wearing clothing."She obviously…

U.S. — Results of a new study have confirmed that the number of "true crime" podcasts produced has officially surpassed the number of actual murders in the world, per capita."We had our suspicions that this particular genre had gotten out…

Man, so nice to get outside after a long day at work. Maybe I'll go grab a burger. Can't wait until — wait, what's that noise? It's coming from the sky. It's like a humming…a thumping. Is it an airplane? No, it's not an airplane. It's…NO…

Basement, Toronto – Your new Maytag washing machine has spent the last 2 minutes playing a longer than necessary tune to alert you that the laundry is done. “It really could have just been one loud buzz,” said Todd Angles, another…

Can you say "bad to the bone"? We hope so, because that's what you'll be compelled to say when you get a load of this ABSOLUTE LEGEND who's riding a motorcycle with not one, not two, not five, but THREE FRIGGIN' WHEELS.****RECORD…

ONTARIO, CA — A local man was eager to rock out alone in his car while blasting the epic soundtrack from the film The Greatest Showman, but he made certain all the windows of his vehicle were closed tightly before doing so."I'm just…

PORTLAND, OR — A local man who recently completed his transition to living as if he were a woman immediately regretted his decision to do so after seeing the line for the ladies' room at a large public event last night."I had no idea I…