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Lightyear

The Onion’s 2023 Holiday Gift Guide

Eight of the world’s signature flames can be yours with this collector’s set of handcrafted fires made from a variety of flammable materials from around the globe. Includes Zimbabwe thatch hut, old-growth forest, jagged wreckage,…

Proud Boys React To Harsh Sentences For Capitol Riots

“Yeah, going to prison sucks. I’d rather go to Disneyland and see Cogsworth. I know he’s not as popular as someone like Mickey Mouse or Buzz Lightyear, but I personally just relate to Cogsworth more. Yep, I’m a Cogsworth man, through and…

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