mexican cuisine

NEW YORK—Issuing a public statement for immediate release, Weight Watchers announced they had gone totally ham on some nachos at approximately 10 p.m. Monday and that’s okay, they’re not going to beat themselves up over it. “Just so…

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MILWAUKEE, WI—Applauding the astute businessperson for seizing upon the market opportunity, sources confirmed Monday that a shrewd entrepreneur had opened a burrito place in the former site of a failed burrito place. “Well, it seems some…

Rosemary Hayne, the 39-year old mother of four who threw a burrito bowl in the face of a Chipotle in Parma, OH, was sentenced to work two months in a fast food restaurant in addition to a 30-day jail sentence. What do you think?“Won’t this…

AUSTIN, MN—Touting the product as an easy, delicious way to nourish a newborn, packaged meat processor Hormel Foods introduced a new chili formula Friday for mothers unable to produce their own chili. “With Hormel’s unique powdered chili…

FORT LIBERTY, NC—As he signed and muttered, “Here we go again,” 13-year-old Army brat Logan Crawshaw was reportedly kicking himself Tuesday after learning his family would be moving just as he was getting comfortable with a new regional…

IRVINE, CA—Ambivalently promoting the menu item in a media campaign that launched Friday, a new Taco Bell ad urges customers to consider whether they are actually interested in trying the fast food restaurant’s Beefy 5-Layer Burrito. “Look,…

‘Obviously, We Didn’t Deliver On Tortilla Chips The Way We Should Have And For That We’re Sorry’PLANO, TX—Following an uncharacteristic lapse in rolling out new products, the Tostitos brand director reportedly apologized Friday for “phoning…