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America Is Lessened With Adam Schiff In The Senate

Visitors in Washington, D.C. should be careful in the hallways between the House and Senate chambers of the U.S. Capitol; there may be a slippery trail of slime as, after more than 20 years in the House, former U.S. Rep. Adam Schiff has…

Idiot Kid Dies After Being Left In Unlocked Car

PARKERSVILLE, MI—After conducting an investigation that concluded he must have been a certified dipshit, authorities confirmed local idiot kid Dylan Zwillet, 6, died Wednesday after being left in an unlocked car. “It’s always a tragedy when…

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