Olympics

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The opening ceremony of the Summer Olympic Games provides the opportunity for the host country to revel in a sense of national pride and celebrate its unique history and traditions. Any jokes about cowardice or cheese-loving aside, France…

The Olympics is an opportunity for host nations to celebrate their cultural contributions to the world. Apparently, the French are most proud of mocking Christians under the shadow of Notre Dame. I’m not straight and I’m not baptized, but…

PARIS – Following the decision by FIFA judges to punish the Canadian women’s soccer organization for illegally surveilling their opponents’ practice, the International Olympic Committee has also awarded the two coaches gold medals in the…

Friday’s drag-queen parody of Christ at the Paris Olympics opening shows yet again that people who hate Jesus just can’t escape His art, archetypes, created realities, or authority. The exhibition replaced Christ in the iconic Leonardo Da…

The Olympic Village built for the 2024 Paris Summer Games is housing 14,250 athletes from 184 different countries. The Onion shares some of the most strict and surprising rules Olympians must follow during their stay.The Onion Film…

PARIS – An Olympic torchbearer jogging through Paris en route to the opening ceremony has accidentally triggered a huge uprising amongst the populace as they reflexively took to the streets. “As a lifelong Parisien I’ve always known what to…

PARIS—With more than a billion viewers tuning in from around the world only to find themselves watching a panel of French film scholars and critical theorists, the opening ceremony of the Paris Olympics began Friday with a tedious 45-minute…

PARIS, FRANCE ― The 2024 Summer Olympics are kicking off this week, and with so many events, you’re likely wondering which ones are worth tuning in for. The short answer is none of them, because summer sports suck. However, if you still…

After his disastrous debate performance, President Joe Biden continues to flounder in the polls and faces a growing contingent of Democratic donors and elected officials calling for him to step down. The Onion explores several possible…