prom

Bridgewater, NS – Through the haze of foggy memories and poor decisions, local high schoolers stumbled home after another post-prom rager, with only the faintest bit of leftover twilight to guide them. This was the latest misadventure for a…

ALLENTOWN, PA—Exchanging tales of license suspensions and alcohol highway safety classes, alumni of William Allen High School reportedly spent their 20-year high school reunion last weekend catching up on each other’s DUIs. “No fucking…

WASHINGTON—Saying the country’s entire adult population would automatically be entered for a chance to win, officials at the U.S. Census Bureau announced Thursday that one lucky American would get to be 16 years old again. “Starting…

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Time to grow up and move home to Eau Claire, WI, say your grandparents. That girl you took to the prom has a good job at the VA hospital and could make room in her life—and condo—for a handsome, single, 34-year-old guy.Mother Shares How…

RICHTON, MS—After being reminded of the district’s zero-tolerance policy, chaperones for the Richton High School prom were reportedly instructed Friday to turn away any students who showed up to the dance with pussy on their breath. “Be on…

BRISTOL, CT—Remarking how he looked exactly like her late husband when they were in high school, local mother Janet Greene told her son Friday that his dad would be “so proud of him” as she adjusted his condom before prom. “Son, I know it’s…