rogers

TORONTO, ON – This week telecom giant Rogers Communications announced a record-breaking milestone – twenty straight years of customer service calls vastly exceeding what their meagre call centres can handle. Rogers customers are well aware…

TORONTO – One week after signing a 12 year deal for NHL broadcasting rights that cost twice as much as their last deal, Rogers CEO Tony Staffieri said the deal is an investment in the company’s ability to force Canadians to continue to…

TORONTO – Telecom giant Rogers announced that it would be ending the free Wifi available at Toronto Transit Commission stations at the end of the year after finding it had too many unintentional benefits to Canadians. “After a couple of…

TORONTO – After announcing they had acquired majority control of Maple Leaf Sports & Entertainment, the board of Rogers Communications reassured Leafs, Raptors, TFC and Argos fans that soon, their teams will be just as successful as the…

TORONTO – The Board of Rogers Communications, owner of the Toronto Blue Jays, have expressed their shock at the information that they are within their rights to fire the executive team of Mark Shapiro and Ross Atkins on account of the team…

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OTTAWA – A recent Angus Reid study has confirmed that Canadian voters are not sure who they will support in the next election, and are willing to give their support to whichever candidate promises to slap Loblaws CEO Galen Weston Jr smack…

OTTAWA – As Elon Musk completes his unintentional mission to reduce twitter, which he bought for 44 billion dollars, to a pile of smoldering ash, Canadians are hoping his next investment will be our big telecoms. “Musk took a incredibly…

TORONTO – Rogers Family board member John Tory has been allowed to continue his night job as mayor of the city of Toronto. “I am thrilled to have the opportunity to serve the people of Toronto,” said Tory at a press conference next to an…

PRINCE ALBERT, SK – As internet service returns to hundreds of Rogers customers nationwide, local copywriter Jack Pally’s plan to enjoy literature has been postponed yet again until the next time he has absolutely no other source of…