Scripture

NAZARETH—Archaeologists working near the ancient village of Nazareth confirmed Monday they have made a fascinating discovery: the blue confetti from baby Jesus's gender reveal party. According to historians, Mary and Joseph held a party for…

U.S.—Bible publishers across the country have agreed to place a spoiler warning in front of all copies of the Book of Revelation, both digital and physical. The message will warn users that reading any further could spoil major plot points…

Archaeologists Finally Discover Holy Grail, Confirm It Was Actually Just Tiny Plastic Cup JERUSALEM—Archaeologists digging near the outskirts of Jerusalem have announced a shocking new discovery, having reportedly located the long-lost Holy…

JERUSALEM—Hundreds of women have come forward to accuse King Solomon of Israel of inappropriate behavior, a report revealed. The alleged misconduct reportedly led to strife within Solomon's kingdom as well as the eventual division of…

Scholars Now Believe Disciples Obnoxiously Shouted 'UNFOLLOWING!' When They Stopped Following Jesus ISRAEL—Scholars now believe that whenever Jesus's many disciples decided they would no longer be following Him, they shouted "UNFOLLOWING!"…

New Evidence Suggests King David Actually Saw Bathsheba Wearing Leggings As Pants JERUSALEM—While conventional wisdom has held that Bathsheba was bathing nude when King David saw her from his window, new analysis of the text indicates she…

ROME—The Apostle Paul was imprisoned in Rome near the time of his death, after a long life suffering in various prison conditions throughout his ministry. Christians have often wondered how Paul the Apostle kept the faith during those dark…

WASHINGTON, D.C.—The president is currently being held in the White House Medical Unit after suffering severe burns. The burns have been connected to a recent event at which President Donald Trump was seen signing people's Bibles in…

Man Who Doesn't Believe Single Word Of Bible Quotes Bible To Prove Political Point PORTLAND, OR—While discussing political issues with a Christian friend at a coffee shop Monday morning, local liberal atheist man Lars Wellson quoted the…

U.S.—During an ecumenical council convened Thursday, representatives from a wide range of Christian denominations universally voted to recognize the 1987 film The Princess Bride and the novel upon which it was based as inspired Scripture.…