Sports

BEIJING — Governor Gavin Newsom showed solidarity with President Biden today by absolutely face planting in front of world leaders."It was a powerful statement of who we are as the Democratic Party," said Newsom aide Denise Heaney. "We…

ARLINGTON, TX—When asked about whether he was looking forward to his team’s upcoming World Series matchup against the Texas Rangers, Arizona Diamondbacks owner Ken Kendrick admitted to reporters Friday that nothing would ever top his team…

SAN ANTONIO—In a thoughtful reflection on the start of his rookie season, San Antonio Spurs power forward Victor Wembanyama admitted to reporters Friday that he was a little overwhelmed by the speed and intensity of NBA groupies. “They’re…

The Coalition for Jewish Values is out with a new ad Thursday calling on professional sports leagues to abandon support for Black Lives Matter (BLM). The ad begins by featuring BLM Co-Founder Patrisse Cullors calling on activists to “step…

SAINT LOUIS, MO — In an effort to repair the damage done to its image that resulted in it being relegated to "gay beer," beverage titan Bud Light has entered into a partnership with a sports organization where sweaty men in underwear hug…

Michigan State University apologized for displaying an image of Adolf Hitler on its stadium video boards as part of a pregame trivia quiz before Saturday’s football game. What do you think?“Well, it’s either that or no pregame Holocaust…

HOUSTON, TX — In a horrific yet tiny accident, Houston Astros second baseman José Altuve was accidentally stepped on as the Texas Rangers stormed the mound to celebrate making it to the World Series."Poor little guy," said Yordan Alvarez,…

WORLD — Billions of people across the globe instantly converted to belief in God after witnessing the utter destruction of the Houston Astros on Tuesday night."So, apparently there really is a loving, all-powerful God," said former atheist…

STERLING HEIGHTS, MI—Demonstrating a level of selflessness and compassion for his fellow human that was worthy of sainthood, a modern-day Mother Teresa reportedly waited for an NFL player on a stretcher to give a thumbs-up Sunday before…

An article published earlier this year in the Journal of Pediatrics examines the effects of overscheduling on children. Specifically, researchers examined the possible link between the increase in children’s mental disorders and the…