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Who Doesn’t Wear The Ribbon?!

Philadelphia Flyers defenseman Ivan Provorov refused to take a pregame skate last night in the team’s LGBTQ+ warmup jersey, citing his preference “to stay true to myself and my religion,” which is Russian Orthodox. “I respect everyone. I…

Onion Sports’ NFL Wild Card Weekend Picks

Bengals: Joe Burrow throws a late-game interception that the Ravens immediately fumble, which the Bengals recover, but then he throws another interception on the very next play, and then the Ravens fumble again, and the Bengals recover…

Logan Paul Challenges Abandoned Pet Pig To Boxing Match

DORADO, PUERTO RICO—Vowing to put the animal in her place “once and for all,” internet personality and professional wrestler Logan Paul publicly challenged his former pet pig Pearl to a boxing match on Friday. “I heard you’ve been oinking a…

In Defense Of College Football Tailgating

The scent of charcoal, cheap beer, and team spirit mingle in the air in an unmistakable and all-American scene: a college football tailgate. And hallelujah, it’s that time of year — or it would be, if the stadium hosting the College…

Pray For Damar Hamlin

After a routine tackle during Monday night’s Bills-Bengals game, Buffalo Bills safety Damar Hamlin collapsed on his back in cardiac arrest. Medical personnel administered CPR for roughly 10 minutes before an ambulance carted Hamlin off the…

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