Sports

ARLINGTON, TX — Despite facing ongoing criticism for being the only remaining Major League Baseball team to not hold a Pride Night, the Texas Rangers announced the club would double down by celebrating a "No Homo Night" at the…

MANACOR, SPAIN—Expressing regret about missing “the amazing event,” Rafael Nadal announced this week that he has officially withdrawn from Wimbledon in order to spend more time pressing his tennis racket against his face to make waffle…

MOSCOW—In an effort to strengthen ties with outside groups two years into Russia’s widely condemned invasion of Ukraine, an increasingly isolated Vladimir Putin confirmed Wednesday that he had tried joining an adult kickball league. “I…

DALLAS, TX — Sources at the Grady household reported this weekend that Bill Grady scrambled for an explanation when his wife Cara caught him watching a WNBA game on his phone.Grady was closely watching a game between the Indiana Fever and…

TORONTO/CALGARY/VANCOUVER/MONTREAL/OTTAWA/WINNIPEG – Casual hockey fan David Hildebrandt was surprised to discover that you are not routing for the Canadian team in the Stanley Cup Finals, because apparently this city based hockey…

Texans know a thing or two about standing tall in the face of adversity. Our heritage is built on resilience, and instilled inside us is a fierce spirit of competition. Our great state also has a long history of celebrating professional…

BALTIMORE—Vowing to eventually address the hooligan, relaxed Orioles security guard Rob McKenzie told reporters Monday that his crew would get around to removing a fan from the field in another inning or so. “Eh, he’s not hurting anyone, so…

GREENVILLE, UT — While her husband was watching a baseball game Sunday, local woman Hannah Wendell idly asked her husband, Mark: "What does OPS stand for?"According to witnesses, Wendell had no inkling of the fate to which she had just…

Nothing can send an otherwise well-adjusted man into a sudden tailspin of depression quite like his favorite sports team losing. Ladies, here are nine ways you can comfort your man when such a tragedy unfolds:Remind him that it's just a…

In recent years, few things have become more ubiquitous in sports than the phrase “GOAT.” The constant presence of sports talk radio on both radio and television has led to frequent use of the acronym, shortened from Greatest of All Time,…