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MILWAUKEE—Following the chaotic events of the past 48 hours, former President Donald Trump reportedly rewrote his Republican National Convention acceptance speech Monday to remove all mentions of never having been shot in the ear. “My track…

MILWAUKEE—In fiery remarks made aboard his private jet as he traveled to Wisconsin for the Republican National Convention, a defiant Donald Trump ridiculed his would-be assassin Monday, calling the individual a “horse-faced slut.” “Let me…

In the wake of calls for him to step down from the presidential race following a poor debate performance and concerns about his mental ability to fulfill his duties, President Biden held an hour-long press conference in an attempt to prove…

WASHINGTON—In an effort to combat escalating concerns about the commander-in-chief’s fitness for office, the Biden campaign kicked off a rapid-fire series of events Tuesday that featured the president waving from very far away. “President…

WASHINGTON—With the insulated electrical cord clenched firmly in his jaws, President Joe Biden spent an entire press conference Wednesday gnawing on an extension cord. The White House press corps was reportedly rapt as they observed the…

CAMBRIDGE, MA—In a Harvard CAPS / Harris poll conducted in the wake of the first presidential debate, new data revealed that any alternative Democratic candidate was likely to lose to former President Donald Trump, regardless of whether…

WASHINGTON—In a partial victory for the former president, the Supreme Court ruled this week that Donald Trump has immunity for any crime committed between the hours of 9 a.m. and 5 p.m. during his time in the White House. “Whether it be…

EAST HAMPTON, NY—Defending her 81-year-old husband in the wake of his highly criticized debate performance, first lady Jill Biden reportedly assured an audience of Democratic donors Monday that she “hit that on the daily,” referring to…

WASHINGTON—With the party’s candidate facing increased pressure to step down after a disastrous debate performance, the Democratic National Committee released a commercial Monday that claims a doddering, out-of-it President Joe Biden will…

WASHINGTON—In the aftermath of a disastrous night that left Democrats reeling over their candidate for the 2024 election, political analysts confirmed Friday that President Joe Biden could negate his debate performance by pulling a train…