U.S.

WASHINGTON, D.C. — A boisterous and jubilant throng gathered on the front lawn of the presidential residence today to celebrate the release of declassified files, as the White House cheerleading squad loaded copies of the Epstein Files…

Atlanta, GA – Reports first made on social media have corroborated that the devil went down to Georgia looking for some souls to steal late Friday night where he was quickly taken into custody by ICE officials. Several eyewitnesses stated…

U.S. — The Internal Revenue Service (IRS) is the most recent government agency affected by the rule of DOGE, with layoff numbers reported in excess of 6,000 persons. Now, bands of former IRS agents are roaming the country, forced to go…

With all of the debate raging over the Department of Government Efficiency requiring all federal employees to respond to an email with a list of things they did during the week, everyone has been left to wonder… what exactly did all of…

WASHINGTON, D.C. — America's new golden age came screeching to an unexpected halt today, as news broke that President Donald Trump had been fired for forgetting to reply to Elon Musk's email.Trump reportedly missed the deadline to respond…

WASHINGTON, D.C. — As rumors swirled that the administration may take over the operation of the post office, President Donald Trump proposed a radical new, modernized version of the U.S. Postal Service where people could send mail…

BOSTON, MA – The Canadian men’s hockey team has successfully seized the 4 Nations hockey championship from their American opponents, completing their annexation of the trophy nearly halfway through the first overtime period. “We…

Now that Kash Patel has been officially confirmed as the new director of the Federal Bureau of Investigation, he's rolling out a new list of top priorities for the agency to focus on moving forward.Through intricate back channels, The…

Ever since polls were released showing Canadians overwhelmingly reject Donald Trump’s proposal to become the 51st state by 77-15%, the question everyone has been asking is: who the fuck are these 15% and what is wrong with them. Well look…

NEW YORK, NY — In a desperate attempt to blend in, son of the president, Barron Trump, has reportedly resorted to putting his knees in his shoes and walking around campus like a normal-height person.Eyewitnesses said the NYU freshman…